GROW BETTER, NOT BITTER

I’m a vivid dreamer, and when I wake up from nightmares with clammy hands, feet and watery eyes, pain comes rushing in like a flood and ravels me in a web. Maybe you experience this too?


Sometimes the pain of abuse and neglect resurfaces in our daily life, long after the incident took place. Sometimes our “fight or flight” kicks in, and we become an ocean of emotions as we go about in our daily lives.

How often do we stop and just allow ourselves to feel the pain? We disguise it behind activities, behind work, behind our phones, behind a smile. We allow so many things to fill the void rather than dealing with what our hearts are trying to work out in order to bring healing to us. The beautiful thing about life is that pain is only temporary. Pain does not last forever!

People will come and go in your life, but we have someone who sticks closer than any other. People may step on you, manipulate you, and try to damage your reputation, but we have a God who vindicates the cause of the righteous. You may discover the people you loved so much and cared for more than anything in your life may just not be capable of love, but that has nothing to do with you. There is nothing wrong with you when people refuse to see your worth, there is something wrong with them. The pain we experience will either cause you and I to become better or bitter!


Daily we get to decide whether to set ourselves in a prison and deny ourselves the joys of life while the key dangles within our reach, or we can choose to truly move on, let go, and live the life God intended for us.

Sometimes you think by “letting go” you are teaching someone a lesson, you’re teaching them to never hurt you again, right? The truth is, letting go means, “I forgive you, but I need God to bring healing to my heart and your distraction is getting in the way.”

Your heart is a masterpiece, and you don’t deserve anything less than to be respected, loved, and appreciated!

Sometimes it’s the people who shouldn’t hurt us. Sometimes pain manifests in the form of a family member, a spouse, or a lifetime friend, but you don’t deserve to carry that pain with you any longer.


You deserve better, God has called you to make decisions in you life that are for your own betterment!

Sometimes there is nothing else we can do but allow ourselves to come face to face with the pain we’ve experienced and allow God to minister to us and love us, His way. He will take you from glory to glory, and He will give you exactly what you need to get through this season in your life. The truth is that you don’t “need” anyone in this life except for Christ and the good news for us is that He is the one that will never leave. We literally cannot escape His love!


So today I encourage you, may you allow God love you well. May you let God heal your heart of the pain you’ve experienced in this life. May you allow God to render beauty from your ashes. May you realize your incredible worth and stop giving people discounts. May you stop running back to the people, places, and things that hurt you in the first place.

May you grow better, not bitter!

God has a plan for your life, and this pain is playing its part in your destiny. This pain is molding you into the person you are meant to be. This pain is a transfer of power, because it’s only when you’ve been there, that you can really reach those who are there.

May you allow God to love you well. He is the very best physician after all!

Nicole Hoffmann

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“Attitude is a choice. Happiness is a choice. Optimism is a choice. Kindness is a choice. Giving is a choice. Respect is a choice. Whatever choice you make makes you. Choose wisely.”
― Roy T. Bennett

Cape Town

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